Open Mouth, Insert Foot, Chew Slowly
What with all of the women wearing Empire waist or baby doll tops these days, it’s getting hard to know who’s pregnant, who’s bloated from PMS, and who’s just making a fashion faux pas.
So one might think I’d know better than to ask a swollen-bellied woman standing next to me in the elevator, “When is your baby due?” But considering that she was wearing a top identical to one I’d worn while 9 months pregnant with The Big-Eyed Boy, and she was carrying a Tarjay shopping bag filled with crib bedding, I thought it was a fair question to ask.
Not surprisingly, she didn’t think so and let me know, in no uncertain terms, that she was not only fat but downright tired of people discriminating against her for it. “Women are supposed to have a womanly shape,” she practically screamed in my face.
And since I do not take kindly to being screamed at, much less by strangers, I couldn’t resist snapping back: “Of course they are. But it looks like you ATE a whole other woman to get a shape like that!”
Thank goodness I got off on the next floor.
6 Responses to “Open Mouth, Insert Foot, Chew Slowly”
That is exactly why I refuse to wear empire waist clothing. It was bad enough when is was first fashionable! My wedding dress had a mid-waist, somewhat lower than empire and I still had to deal with the questions about how far along I was.
I think the whole town was disappointed I didn’t have a baby until 3 years later.
I occasionally get the odd jolt of optimism and shell out for an Empire waist top. Of course, the lying mirrors in the department store make it look lovely, but the instant I get it home I realize I actually look like I’m 9 months along. With sextuplets.
LOL (at your response to her screaming, not at the debacle). I have several Empire waist tops, and yeah, they just don’t look the same once you get them home and look in real mirrors.
Is it bad if I go ahead and wear them, hoping people will think I’m just pregnant and not fat?
Heh. I’ve had days where I hope the same thing when wearing tops I know aren’t flattering. Problem is, I kind of blow the whole “yeah, I’m not fat, I’m pregnant” thing when I light up a cigarette and order a martini.
Empire waisted clothing is for women who fit the archetypal “model” image, IMO. That cut generally doesn’t look good on women that actually look like women. My 15 yr old realized that this last school-shopping season when she tried one on and it didn’t fit quite the way a similar blouse had the year before. Red gently explained to her that a change in the way you’re shaped generally affects the style of clothing that looks good on you.
*sigh* I’m gonna have to get a big stick to deal with the boys.
Don’t forget: empire waist tops came back in style when hip-huggers did, and for a good reason. They hide the inevitable muffin top those darned pants create on any girl/woman with actual HIPS.
Of course they still look like crap but, hey, it’s “fashionable”.
Me? I can’t wait until Mom Jeans come back in style!