Liquid Calories

Friday nights kill my diet. Friday nights like last night — spent with friends having dinner and drinks — really ruin my diet. Unfortunately, I seldom realize it until Saturday morning when I stand on that scale and see that I managed to pack on a pound or two overnight. Sure, it’s water weight but, as I keep telling myself, every ounce counts when you’re trying to lose.

It’s easy to dismiss liquid calories, particularly since they often accompany much more diet-damaging fare. That 100-calorie glass of wine seems innocent compared to, say, an 800-calorie bowl of bouillabaisse and 200-calorie slice of bread from that huge basket restaurants insist on putting right in front of you. Change that wine to a martini — and change the one to two doubles — and it’s not so innocent after all. Not that I think of such things at the time.

I do, however, tend to think shortly thereafter that Cheetohs sound good. Hey, there’s cheese-like substances in there, right? Isn’t cheese a dairy product? Aren’t dairy products supposed to help women lose weight? That’s the downside of enjoying a drink — or two — with one’s meal: stupidity often ensues.

Alcohol, and its effects usually set the stage for binge eating. At only two drinks, your body seeks a heavier and more satisfying type of fare, and you guessed it, yet even more calories. The caloric cycle of almost anyone under the influence of a few drinks can prove to be a hidden diet disaster. The binge eating will almost undoubtedly ensue.

“Binge eating.” What a nice way to describe that refrigerator-emptying mania that takes over later in the evening, right about the time one’s stomach begins to demand something — anything — help absorb the alcohol sloshing about within it.

They say that the way to success is to build a better mousetrap. Obviously, this adage wasn’t first uttered by someone faced with the choice of giving up their martinis or giving up on their diet. Want the world to beat a path to your door? Invent calorie-free alcohol.

Until then, it looks as if I’ve found yet another thing I’ll have to pare from my life if I want any hope of paring my waistline.